Objectivity in texts
To adopt an objective viewpoint in your writing of academic
texts you
should
avoid
using:
● 1st and 2nd person pronouns
● emotive
language
● biased language
(gender/cultural/argument).
1st and
2nd person pronouns
First person pronouns include: I/we/me/us/my/our/mine/ours. Second person pronouns
include: you/your/yours.
First and second
person pronouns
are commonly used
in spoken language and in informal written texts such as
journals,
where the
writer is reflecting on experiences, or in
study
textbooks,
where the writer wants to
establish a rapport with the readers (students) of the
text.
However,
in academic
writing,
in order to achieve
a more objective position in the text, the
writer is mostly discouraged from using 1st and 2nd
person pronouns.
Table 4: Rewording first
and second person pronoun
expressions
1st and 2nd person
pronouns in sentences
|
Reworded sentences
|
||
As we have
discussed,
noise pollution can
result in
hearing loss.
|
✗
|
As discussed,
noise pollution
can result in hearing loss.
|
✓
|
In my personal opinion, management should put these recommendations in place immediately.
|
✗
|
(delete mention of this phrase altogether) Management should put
these recommendations in place immediately.
|
✓
|
The client needs to tell you details
of previous illnesses in order for you to
prepare a true record of his/her medical
history.
|
✗
|
Information about the client’s previous
illnesses will help the
nurse to establish a
true record
of
his/her
medical history
|
✓
|
Kavanaugh’s seven stages of stress seem
to be the best that I’ve come across.
|
✗
|
Kavanaugh (1997, p. 32) clearly identifies seven
stages of stress.
(* see note below)
|
✓
|
*You should
ensure
that you
use correct in-text referencing conventions when
an author’s
work is
cited in your writing.
Emotive language
Emotive
language in
expository style writing should
be
used with caution. In striving to
advance an argument or prove a point in your writing, you should
provide evidence
to convince your reader, rather than using colourful, emotive language.
Table 5: Rewording emotive expressions
Emotive expressions in
sentences
|
Reworded sentences
|
||
Atrocious health
conditions in the
refugee camps were
unbearable.
|
✗
|
Lack of clean water and
sanitation
facilities led to widespread cases of
diarrhoea throughout
the refugee camps.
|
✓
|
Vast numbers of people
are dying off
every year due to continued bouts of malaria.
|
✗
|
More than 100 000 people a
year are dying because of continued bouts of malaria.
|
✓
|
The spread of disease has had heart
rending effects on
the community.
|
✗
|
The spread of disease in the community
has left both young
children
and the aged without family
carers.
|
✓
|
Biased language (gender/cultural/argument)
Using language
that demonstrates gender bias or stereotyping can be offensive, and
can misrepresent a situation.
Academic
practice discourages gender-biased use of language. It
favours inclusive
language.
Table 6: Removing gender bias
in expressions
Gender bias, stereotyping,
or discrimination
in sentences
|
Reworded sentences
|
||
The medical history of each patient should
be available for the doctor’s
perusal to assist in his diagnosis.
Incorrect assumption: all doctors are males.
|
✗
|
The medical history of each patient should
be available for the doctor’s
perusal to assist in his/her diagnosis.
|
✓
|
He plans to continue his studies to become
a male nurse.
Incorrect assumption: nurse refers to
female nurses only.
|
✗
|
He plans to continue his
studies to
become a nurse.
|
✓
|
The chairman’s duties for conducting a council meeting are set out in a formal document.
Incorrect assumption: only men chair
meetings.
|
✗
|
The chairperson’s duties for conducting a council meeting are set out in
a formal
document.
The chair’s duties for conducting a
council meeting are set out in
a formal
document.
|
✓
|
Using language
that demonstrates cultural bias or
stereotyping can
be offensive, and can
misrepresent a situation.
Academic
practice discourages this stereotyped
use
of language.
Table 7: Removing cultural bias
in expressions
Cultural bias in
sentences
|
Reworded sentences
|
||
The growing number of older people in
nursing homes and institutions
for the
aged, is typical of Australians’ disregard for the
older members
of
their families.
Incorrect assumption: respect for older family
members
is shown in
the same way from culture to
culture.
|
✗
|
The growing number of older people in
nursing homes and institutions
for the
aged, may be indicative of
Australians’
regard for independent lifestyles of family
members; young or old.
|
✓
|
With the innate
cunning of their
race, these dealers are able
to
secure excellent prices for their products.
Incorrect assumption: all people
of
a particular ethnic
background share
the same characteristics.
|
✗
|
These dealers
are
able to
obtain excellent prices for their products.
|
✓
|
Using language
that demonstrates a bias in
the argument presented can misrepresent a
situation and mislead the reader about the
actual events.
Although
an assignment task may require a student to justify a
point of view, this does not mean the student should skew the evidence so
that the result is a biased presentation
of a
situation. Academic
practice
discourages this approach. It values reasoned
argument.
Table 8: Removing bias in an argument
Argument bias
in
sentences
|
Reworded sentences
|
||
Alcohol consumption leads to physical,
psychological and
sociological deterioration.
Incorrect assumption: any level of
alcohol consumption
at
any time will be damaging.
|
✗
|
Excessive alcohol consumption over
an extended period, frequently leads to
physical, psychological and sociological
deterioration.
|
✓
|
Low productivity levels and
general lack of job
satisfaction are
a result of poor communication between management and
marketing staff.
Incorrect assumption: poor communication
is the only responsible
factor ... there may be other factors to
consider.
|
✗
|
Poor communication
between
management and
marketing staff, may
have contributed to the low productivity
levels and
general lack of job
satisfaction being currently
experienced.
|
✓
|
