IELTS essay, topic: Why do criminals commit another offence after being punished?
Many offenders commit more crimes after serving the first punishment.
Why is this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this
problem?
It is true that some criminals commit crimes again after they have been
punished. While there are several reasons for this alarming trend, some
effective measures can be taken by governments to tackle this problem.
There are two main reasons for re-offenders. Firstly, the prison system
can make the situation worse. Criminals put together in prison and they
make friends with other offenders. While they are locked up in prison,
they do not have much to do there, and they would exchange information
about what they have done before they came to the prison or they may
plan crimes with other inmates. Secondly, offenders often do not have
any other means of earning money. They are poor, uneducated and lacking
skills needed to maintain a job. Also, a criminal record makes finding a
job difficult as people usually avoid hiring ex-convict.
To solve this problem, governments should focus on rehabilitation of
criminals rather than punishment. Above all, prisons need vocational
training which makes inmates to prepare for life outside the prison.
They can learn practical skills such as computer programming, car
maintenance and graphic design. In this way, they can be hired for a
position that requires this certain knowledge and skills. Community
service is another way to reform offenders. Rather than being locked up
in prison with other inmates, offenders can help society and become
useful to their local community, and these activities would eliminate
the negative influence that prisons can have.
In conclusion, it is true the re-offenders are one of the problems in
our community; it can be solved by focusing rehabilitation rather than
punishment itself.
This is a good essay. The requirements of the task statement are
covered, the reasoning is logical and presented in a coherent, easy to
follow way, the range of vocabulary is wide enough and the writer shows
fluency and flexibility. Some minor errors in this essay include word
choice and preposition errors (mouse over the words underlined in blue
shows suggested corrections). Overall this looks like an IELTS Band 8
essay.
